Monday, October 17, 2005

Peruse this:

"Good Morning,

For your perusal:

Logline: Where is my wife?... She doesn't exist... She never did....

Brief Synopsis. John is a well liked and prosperous New York lawyer, with a perfect marriage, a baby on the way and a promotion eminent after another win in his latest case, Life couldn't get any better....

but his world is far from real.... from hearing dark whispering voices.... sharp brief hallucinations... John's reoccurring nightmare comes to life as he is hit by a car.

Waking up in hospital, John's world becomes apparent, he's been living a dream brought on my an experimental treatment... What he once had, he's lost, and the only woman he's ever loved... never existed..... or does she???"

57 Comments:

At 10:10 AM, Blogger COLOfilm said...

Working Title: Eternal Plagiarism of the Feeble Mind

 
At 10:13 AM, Blogger Chris said...

Well here's the first problem: "well liked" and "New York lawyer" in the same sentence.

 
At 10:16 AM, Blogger katiescarlet said...

I didn't watch this movie the first 3 or 4 times it was made, (including Flight Plan-daughter instead of wife) so why would I want to watch this one!

 
At 10:27 AM, Blogger BWeaves said...

Total Recall II.

The Family Man II, The Annulment.

And that episode of "Buffy The Vampire Slayer" where you find out she's really in a mental ward, and she's just dreaming that she's a vampire slayer.

 
At 10:28 AM, Blogger BWeaves said...

Sooooo, the entire movie is about a guy strapped into a hospital bed ranting about people who don't exist? PASS.

 
At 10:34 AM, Blogger Meg said...

A lawyer hearing dark whispering voices and having sharp brief hallucinations? What else is new?

Does she exist? For her sake, I hope not.

 
At 10:35 AM, Blogger Meg said...

And how does the writer know that it's morning someone will read this query? Does no one work in the afternoon in Hollywood?

 
At 10:39 AM, Blogger Sidhedevil said...

Vanilla Sky/Obsession/Vertigo blah, blah, blah.

BECAUSE THE DAUGHTER HAD THE PLAGUE, AND THE HOTEL DIDN'T WANT ANYONE TO FIND OUT!

 
At 10:42 AM, Blogger Bargaintuan said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 10:46 AM, Blogger Bargaintuan said...

Sorry, Billy, but this screams Talking Heads.

And you may find yourself working in a New York practice
And you may find yourself in line for a promotion
And you may find yourself in a perfect marriage with a baby on the way
And you may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful wife
And you may ask yourself, well, how did I get here?

Letting the days go by, let the doctors hold me down.
Letting the days go by, electrodes connected to my crown.
Into the dream again, or is this reality?
Once in a lifetime, or maybe two or three.

And you may ask yourself, what are these voices?
And you may ask yourself, what are these brief hallucinations?
And you may tell yourself, this is not my beautiful house!
And you may tell yourself, this is not my beautiful wife!

Letting the days go by, let the doctors hold me down.
Letting the days go by, electrodes connected to my crown.
Into the dream again, oh, and watch out for that car.
Once in a lifetime, this is just frickin' bizarre.

Not like it ever was...
Not like it ever was...
Not like it ever was...
Not like it ever was...
Not like it ever was...
Not like it ever was...
Not like it ever was...
Not like it ever was...

Vanilla Sky? Never heard of it.
I don't really watch movies much.
Abre los ojos? What's that? Spanish?
My screenplay is totally original!

Letting the days go by, let the doctors hold me down.
Letting the days go by, electrodes connected to my crown.
Into the dream again, please, I hope you can forgive.
Once in a lifetime, if my script's derivative.

Same as the other ones...
Same as the other ones...
Same as the other ones...
Same as the other ones...
Same as the other ones...
Same as the other ones...
Same as the other ones...
Same as the other ones...

 
At 11:35 AM, Blogger BWeaves said...

Oh! Bargaintuan. You are brilliant!!!

 
At 11:38 AM, Blogger Shelley123 said...

Meg - If "work" means being face down in a pile of coke while sending our assistant's assistant out for more Oxy, then yes, we do work in the afternoons.

 
At 11:41 AM, Blogger Fraulein N said...

"What are these brief hallucinations?" Bwah! That's gotta be my favorite line. The best part of the query: "Where is my wife?" Damn, I don't know, but she really should have talked you out of this.

 
At 11:47 AM, Blogger penlies said...

"Logline: Where is my wife?... She doesn't exist... She never did...."

Where is the problem in this?

It should go "Logline: Where is my wife?... She doesn't exist... She never did....Cool...I'm going to watch football...get drunk....and bang the girl in 401... fin"

 
At 11:49 AM, Blogger kojled said...

for your perusal? well, thanks at least for the brief synopsis -- not like those sweeping epic synopses we're used to.

anyway, i'm currently trying to get a green light on matrix XXII - the dreamening. this script sounds promising. please send

 
At 11:50 AM, Blogger gwendemarco said...

Logline: Where is my wife?... She doesn't exist... She never did....

Sounds like a dream for 4 out of 5 guys in US.

 
At 11:54 AM, Blogger penlies said...

beat ya gweny

 
At 11:59 AM, Blogger gwendemarco said...

_______ minds think a like, penny.

 
At 12:12 PM, Blogger BWeaves said...

Penny and Gwenny sitting in a tree.
P I S S I N G.

Sorry, these things bring out the worst in me.

 
At 12:52 PM, Blogger Max Schadenfreude said...

Let's not forget to add Jacob's Ladder to the list.

Brief hallucinations? Man, I woulda pegged hime as a boxer hallucination kinda guy.

And what's up with reoccuring, shouldn't that simple be recurring?

 
At 1:11 PM, Blogger Shelley123 said...

But wait...aren't they "sharp brief hallucinations"? Ouch! And just what are "dark" whispering voices? Are there "light" whispering voices, too? Don't even get me started on "a promotion eminent" or the capitalization of "Life"....And I just hate it when my world becomes apparent, don't you? Also, if he's living in a dream how can he fucking lose anything he once had, huh?

 
At 1:15 PM, Blogger Mustang Sally said...

It's all the above movies, plus "The Forgotten." Very original.

 
At 1:41 PM, Blogger penlies said...

I have very mundane whispering voice in my head, it tells me to “pick up the laundry” and “make sure to brush your teeth.” The voice sounds like a spooky Alan Arkin.

 
At 1:44 PM, Blogger Meg said...

Does that voice also tell you to stay home and clean the guns, penlies?

 
At 2:05 PM, Blogger penlies said...

Think blue State Meg, we don’t have guns we have lawyers. A far cry from civilized I admit but it beats shooting each other. (We let the ethnics do that.) I have cleaned my lawyer a few times but the slime always grows back.

 
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At 4:13 PM, Blogger arrogantcow said...

"Waking up in hospital, John's world becomes apparent"
That tends to happen when you open your eyes, alright...

 
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At 5:24 PM, Blogger VP19 said...

Add "upstate" to "New York lawyer" and you may have something different and fresh. However, the suits in research would probably be aghast at a film set in Syracuse or Schenectady. Heck, they'd probably feel that way if it were in Brooklyn. So he'll be your usual Upper East Sider, probably with a law degree from Harvard or Yale. As if we haven't seen that before.

 
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At 4:03 AM, Blogger cinekat said...

Bargaintuan: when are you finally publishing your songbook? Before the holiday season?

 
At 7:25 AM, Blogger Taffy Doublewide said...

I'm hoping Bargaintuan puts out a "holiday" CD, and it's played in all the Starbucks and elevators for the whole six-month "holiday" season. I think "holiday" music with Query Letters lyrics might be something I wouldn't tire of immediately.

(We're not allowed to say "Christmas" or "Hanukkah" or even "Kwanza" in this blue state for fear of offending the other celebrations--not that I named all of them. Instead, we call the menorah and absolutely everything Christmas-related a "holiday" whatever [holiday candle, holiday tree, holiday scene...] and only allow these holiday decorations to go up at city hall. Then we act surprised when the 6,798 other religions here complain about being left out. Since we're celebrating Festivus this year, I'm going to hurl insults at the city council until they relent and allow my Festivus pole to grace the steps of city hall. I'll bet Penlies would love to see my Festivus pole on public display and I'd let him, but only if he's a well-liked New York lawyer who can help me out.)

 
At 10:17 AM, Blogger unMuse said...

I have been living in a wonderful dream where people don't over-use punctuation. Sadly, I was just violently shaken back into reality.

 
At 10:55 AM, Blogger PJ McIlvaine said...

This is a gag. This logline doesn't exist, see?

 
At 11:00 AM, Blogger Blog ho said...

she doesn't.

 
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