Friday, April 22, 2005

Crap, he wrote.

"Two little old lady mystery buffs decide to murder people in the public library."

35 Comments:

At 3:53 PM, Blogger Annoynimus said...

And then...?

 
At 3:59 PM, Blogger Shelley123 said...

Wait...there are still public libraries? Who knew?

PS It was better when it was called Arsenic and Old Lace.

 
At 4:09 PM, Blogger gwendemarco said...

Shelley, I think they mean Li-berry.

 
At 4:15 PM, Blogger Bargaintuan said...

As long as they do it quietly, I don't have a problem.

 
At 4:49 PM, Blogger crazed_writer said...

Old ladies with murderous intent,
nancy drew in drag is onto you.
Your murderous spree is over.

 
At 4:56 PM, Blogger rightcoast said...

... while two little old lady necrophiliac buffs have sex with the bodies.

 
At 5:44 PM, Blogger Taffy Doublewide said...

This is exactly why I avoid libraries.

 
At 3:23 AM, Blogger afterart said...

pass the prune juice

 
At 8:37 AM, Blogger James said...

I work in a library and I'd pay two little old ladies to come in and start offing some of the assholes I have to deal with.

 
At 11:15 AM, Blogger Simon said...

I visit the library, and I think I have seen the old ladies.

 
At 4:54 PM, Blogger RockSteady said...

I want BCPhil back to post on this: "This would be a really great idea, if you had the two little old ladies using Xtreme weapons to off the people in the library... but it should be a medieval library, and the head librarian's name should be Thor..."

 
At 7:23 PM, Blogger Sidhedevil said...

I decide to murder people in the public library every time I go in there.

Now, if the little old ladies actually did it after deciding...


...nah, it'd still suck.

 
At 3:29 AM, Blogger cinekat said...

Maybe if they had pink bumpernuts on their wheelchairs/walkers?

 
At 6:29 AM, Blogger Meg said...

Arsenic and Old Books

 
At 6:32 AM, Blogger Simon said...

Arsenic & Old Books? Nah... that'd never fly...

 
At 8:15 AM, Blogger His Monkey Wife said...

A dime a day for overdue books just wasn't forceful enough for patrons to get the message. BRING IT BACK ON TIME OR PAY THE PRICE.

There's people WAITING for the latest Janet Evanovich, you selfish pig.

 
At 8:20 AM, Blogger crazed_writer said...

Okay i'll say it.

Arsenic and old face.

 
At 8:25 AM, Blogger Meg said...

Believe it or not, there are actually security officers in charge of getting library books back. The library police. No joke. I used to be a prosecutor and had to work with those whack jobs when the Harry Potter books would be out for months. Sad, but true.

 
At 10:31 AM, Blogger feed_jake said...

SHAGGY: Like, zoiks, Scoob! There's a stalker in the stacks and she's headed this way.

S.D: Ruh-Roh, Raggie!

VELMA: Run for it, gang!

 
At 11:06 AM, Blogger Bladestorm said...

Meg, would the library police be prepared to protect library patrons from geriatric serial killers? Is that actually part of their job descriptions?

 
At 3:03 PM, Blogger Meg said...

The one I dealt with would have LOVED the opportunity to kick some geriatric ass. He was a lot like the security guard in Mannequin. Minus the dog.

 
At 11:41 AM, Blogger ro828 said...

Actually, it's not that bad an idea. It's been done, of course: ARSENIC AND OLD LACE, HOMEBODIES, the play BULL IN A CHINA SHOP. But geriatric serial killers could be fun if you don't mind your humor very much on the dark side. The people (uh, I guess I should say human vermin) they would eleminate would have to be very unpleasant and very cartoonish, but in the right hands it could be good. Just imagine if Ruth Gordon and Garson Kanin were still alive, the things they could do with it.

Of course, compared to what we usually see on these pages, it's sheer genius.

 
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Strange day or what? :-)

 
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