Huge bargain!! But, no Buy-It-Now :(
"A confused, love-bitten man entangled with a ruthless underworld kingpin. This quiet storm brewing between an employer and his employee blends wonderfully into a medley of perils."
No, I won't be bidding on this, thanks.
posted by The Empress @ 10:43 AM
93 comments
93 Comments:
Wow. What a motherf*****, p**** of d***** sh**. The writer certainly has no g*d d*** f***** clue about selling a script in Hollywood. Doesn't he know the starting price for a "crafty" script is a simple blo**** and that $5000 entitles the prod**** fist**** rights as well?
I love how the Ebay description calls it "Crafty." Perhaps they meant "Crappy?"
Waiter, I would like a generous helping of love bitten man and underworld kingpin with a side of the medley of perils. Oh, and I 'd like my kingpin on the side. Thanks.
I wanted to buy this 98 page masterpiece but then I read I would have to pay $2.00 for shipping. Deal breaker.
Why is it so freaking hard to log in and post comments!!!????
This post has been removed by a blog administrator.
Heroin is clearly making a comback. The hero's mom is also a smack addict according to the Ebay listing. I long for the old days of good ol' meth.
By the way, I love how the writer has a minimum of $5g, as if $4,500 would be an insult. I bet if you countered with a bus pass and 2 hot dogs you could own this beauty.
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Oh boy, this is way too rich! This guy makes Sharkguy look like a true pro.
And I'm pretty sure he's dreaming of Entertainment Weekly headlines such as:
"The Newby Who Beat The Hollywood System.
"By placing his script on ebay, he skipped the managers, readers, developers and won seven figures in the biggest bid-war in recent years.
"'It was just thought outside the box' --he says-- 'just like I never went to film-school or read one of those books on writing screenplays.'"
What, no bids? That's incredible!!!
I was sold on the heat-pounding action.
This is great! Normally, we only get to read the crappy queries. This guy let us read his crappy scenes too. It's like DVD extras in blog form.
I just noticed it's for sale in the states only!!
I feel that Canadians should be able to buy crap just like any American.
The balls on this guy. Setting such a high starting price on that hackneyed piece of crap. He should have set a hidden reserve price and found out what it's really worth.
Thanks crazed writer! This is my heroin.
Wow! I couldn't force myself to read the whole thing on ebay. I can imagine paying five grand for all 98 pages.
I was gonna buy the script for the 5 grand, but then I saw that postage was $2...now way!
I liked the scene with the donut. Did you notice how the donut was a metaphor for the emptiness of the man's life and as the man eats the donut it symbolizes his meeting with death. This guy is good.
Also what the hell does love-biten mean? Is that just another word for STD?
For the sequel, Mr. Slice's half-brother, Mr. Sierra Mist, shows up to seek revenge...
For 5 grand he can afford the freaking priority mail. Christ, what a cheapass.
I can hear the commercials for this now: "In the night... a man... had a doughnut... what he... didn't know... it would... be... his... last... 'NOOOOOOOO!!!' - The drama that was sold on Ebay 'Lets go see Don' comes straight to DVD this fall! Get ready for 'I Won an Ebay Action and all I got was 98 pages of crap!' rated PG-13 for suicidal subliminal messages... No, you'll just want to kill yourself for seeing it!
You mean he ate the donut? I thought he blew it up or something.
Ooh! The Kingpin was a giant robot for a flunky. Kick-ass!(Aliusion to the anime BIG O.)
Typo: I mean allusion
From the end of the script sample on Ebay:
MR.SLICE - No. You got to burn his a** off. That leech is Detective Stinson. The only way to get him off our back is to off his ass. That’s where you come in.
I thought the "a**" should be interpreted as ass. So why would you write "a**" if you were going to write "ass" two sentences later?
Uh oh. Does "a**" mean something bad?
In the diner scene between the two detectives, did the author mean to say "Don Quixote" or "Don Juan"? If you're going to try to impress us with a literary allusion, shouldn't you have the right Don?
"Scott must choose between true love and upsetting the wicked mind of his hard-edged boss."
If he has to choose between them, he should just choose true love. His boss will have to live without having his wicked mind upset.
On the other hand, if he had to choose between true love and not upsetting his boss - that might be different....
It is sad how many mistakes and stuff ups there are in the sample they post. Didn't they let anyone else review it before they embarrassed themself?
Ebay probably charged about a $150 insertion fee for that.
Damn! I mean 'has', not 'was'
the don quixote line is by far the funniest part! apparantly this guy thinks that all don's are created equal.
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Hmmm... people buy used chewing gum on eBay, but this bad boy has no bids yet. At least it's a no reserve auction.
Upside: shipping's only 2 bucks. Here's a thought: make the opening bid $2 and shipping $4998 (overnight!) and maybe he could ensnare some myopic loser. And so would begin a tragic revenge cycle...
UPDATE:
After 7 days, the guy still has 0 bids.
How about if we get some money together and make an offer to him "hey, kid. After six months on Ebay you got 0 bids, but we wisecracks at QLIL got together 2.79 and want to buy your script. Take it or leave it."
This post has been removed by a blog administrator.
The script is gone!
But you do have lots of time to purchase some dazzling earrings:
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